On the first day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me a declining white blood cell count.
On the second day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me two peeling feet and a declining white blood cell count.
On the third day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me three bleeding gums, two peeling feet, and a declining white blood cell count.
On the fourth day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me four tingling fingers, three bleeding gums, two peeling feet, and a declining white blood cell count.
On the fifth day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me five achy joints. (brief pause).
...four tingling fingers, three bleeding gums, two peeling feet, and a declining white blood cell count.
On the sixth day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me six sleepless nights, five achy joints. (brief pause).
...four tingling fingers, three bleeding gums, two peeling feet, and a declining white blood cell count.
On the seventh day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me seven bouts of nausea, six sleepless nights, five achy joints. (brief pause).
...four tingling fingers, three bleeding gums, two peeling feet, and a declining white blood cell count.
On the eighth day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me eight stool softeners, seven bouts of nausea, six sleepless nights, five achy joints. (brief pause).
...four tingling fingers, three bleeding gums, two peeling feet, and a declining white blood cell count.
On the ninth day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me nine itchy rashes, eight stool softeners, seven bouts of nausea, six sleepless nights, five achy joints. (brief pause).
...four tingling fingers, three bleeding gums, two peeling feet, and a declining white blood cell count.
On the tenth day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me ten balding patches, nine itchy rashes, eight stool softeners, seven bouts of nausea, six sleepless nights, five achy joints. (brief pause).
...four tingling fingers, three bleeding gums, two peeling feet, and a declining white blood cell count.
On the eleventh day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me eleven days’ exhaustion, ten balding patches, nine itchy rashes, eight stool softeners, seven bouts of nausea, six sleepless nights, five achy joints. (brief pause).
...four tingling fingers, three bleeding gums, two peeling feet, and a declining white blood cell count.
On the twelfth day of Taxol, my doctor gave to me twelve days of brain fog, eleven days’ exhaustion, ten balding patches, nine itchy rashes, eight stool softeners, seven bouts of nausea, six sleepless nights, five achy joints. (brief pause).
...four tingling fingers, three bleeding gums, two peeling feet, and a declining white blood cell count.
I mean, what ELSE do I have to do? Oh, yeah, sleep, complain, drink tons of water, go to the bathroom 1,000 times a day, watch the dog snore...listen to endless podcasts when my eyes get too blurry to see,...eat. I put in "brief pause" as there's a good chance that my oncologist's office is going to perform this at their company Christmas party. Cool, huh? Oh, to be a fly on THAT wall! 🎄
Wow! Is the formatting all whacked out on this? My chemo brain - oh, ALL RIGHT! My BRAIN, PERIOD can NOT figure out how to remedy that. Fortunately these lyrics are repetitive as heck, plus everyone and their uncle knows this song so, hopefully, you won't have too much trouble singing along in your head. Or out loud. Whatever your office mates can tolerate. 😜
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